If you were to believe the NT news that is ! I must admit where would this blog be without them ? Last week it was spa bathing buffalo , this week its a couch lovin’ pig !
As always when I arrive for work each morning at Hot 100 I collect the morning papers to hand out to all the freebie huntin’ masses of Darwin. I flick through the paper while I wait for the station to call for my location . Today when I got to page 3 I absolutley pissed myself laughing ….
This furniture lovin’ piggy was spotted yesterday in a suburb of Darwin having sex with an armchair in the middle of the road. Now this sort of thing happens all the time out in the bush , but Darwin is a ‘capital city’ as one witness told the paper ( calling Darwin a city might be going a little far – maybe one day but I’m pretty sure to be a city you need to have shitloads of people living there). Last year the NT news ran a story about Horny Harry , a pet pig living in the community of Gunbalanya , NT who had a loving relationship with wheelie bins and thinks he is a camp dog … Harry’s owner caught the piglet 2 or 3 years ago as a pet for his daughter. He maintains Harry is just an ordinary pig who sometimes knocks over bins . Another resident added in “yeah and then he fucks ‘em”. Charming !
Harry Trotter and his pack of adoring camp dogs PIC : MICHAEL FRANCHI www.ntnews.com.au
Hello People !!! Today was absolutely fantabulous !! I got up after an awesome sleep , drove my new (old) Suzuki swift 93 edition ( named Princess ) that my fantabulous boyfriend purchased for me on Friday ( he is now in charge of all motor vehicle purchases ever since the disaster we call the Honda civic that I bought last year and drove for 3 weeks before it broke…not my fault by the way – more about that in the future …)
So anyway I’m driving to work in my new
race car and made it there 10 min early due to driving a car that actually does the bloody speed limit ( the Troopy took 5 mins to get to 100kms an hour ! ). I packed all the free shit into Black Betty and went to do my radio cross as usual. Now for the best part : I drive back to the station to drop the van off and pick up the Princess. Before I left I stopped in to see the brekky presenters Tom and Sarah when shit went down ..:
Me : Hey guys all went well , I guess Ill catch ya tomorrow
Sarah: Actually we wanted to tell you something
Me: (thinking fuck here it goes again , I’m fired ): Oh right sweet whats up?
Sarah: We were just talking about how you’re getting really good at this ..
Tom : Yeah your flow is heaps better and its sounds more natural ..
Me : *aw shucks guys * grinning like the Cheshire cat !
I practice every script 5 times before I say it but lately I have it memorized so well I have started to ad lib etc and obviously its paying off. When I first begun I didn’t think I would last due to my excessive swearing in real life ( I tone it down a bit for my blog ‘cos hey I want people to read it ! ) I really wanted this job so I practiced hard and look ! Practice is starting to make (nearly) perfect !
A common Telstra phone box (Photo credit: Wikipedia)
Donuts on a diet , Payphones and Blonde Moment # 357855
Today started off great. I woke up early , had enough time to actually enjoy my coffee and for once had a hassle free drive to the Hot 100 office. I let my self in with my newly acquired key (up until 2 days ago I had to knock on the back door for ages before anyone heard me and let me in). I loaded the van with milk , newspapers and free passes to every bloody event happening in Darwin this weekend. I then made my way to the bakery to pick up the donuts and cakes that taunt me every morning . I have to give them away along with all the other free stuff and no I can’t even sneak any for myself because I am a girl so of course I’m on a permanent diet (well I try but lets face it my love affair with steak and red wine always see’s me falling off the wagon )
The temptation I face on a daily basis .. It’s not easy I tell ya pic: fanpop.com
I managed to get all of this done with plenty of time to spare so I made my way out to the furthest suburb from the city – which coincidentally is also where I live so I gave myself a pat on the back for going so far out of my way not once but twice
Any-hoo I arrived to my destination with 15 mins to spare so I had plenty of time to read over my new script and organize all the free shit. With 7 mins before going to air I went to get my phone so I was ready when they called. I looked through my bag – no phone .. Ok don’t panic I told myself , It’s probably in the back of the van. I searched the entire van , still no phone …………
FAAAAARRRRRKKK was pretty much all I could say for the next 5 mins as I drove at a million miles an hour to the nearest pay phone. By this time I should have been on air doing my little spiel but no , instead I was at a pay phone calling Telstra directory trying to get the number for the studio. The first number I got no one would pick up. The next number I called was some old dude’s home phone and finally on the third call Sarah from Hot 100 answered .. thank god. So I did my cross this morning from a pay phone outside the post office . Yep like a pro
When I got back into the station I dropped in to see Tom and Sarah and we had a bit of a laugh about the whole thing .. Tom said he wanted to put this song on air in my honor …