Its been a while since I did something completely bat shit crazy , so I thought I’d better get on top of things.
Cant you just be happy with your life as it is and just relax and maybe save some money you ask ?
No. No I can not. Because that would be boring and I don’t do boring. Or sensible.
So , using my amazing decision making skills , I decided to buy a thousand year old clapped out campervan with half a floor which ,at this point, requires a small army to set up . Obviously thats not what I see when I look at it. In my mind the floor is fixed , the hydraulic system is in place and now I’m hanging curtains and sewing cushions like Martha fucking Stewart.
Its not going to be easy but thats where I bring in the ”çrew” which so far consists of my old boss , a self confessed ‘Plumber from Hell’ Tinky ,whose favourite word starts with C ends in T and you apparently cant say it in Canada . Thats it so far , but his daughter , who I work with at the Ettamogah pub , has volunteered to supervise with me. Which is code for lets sit around , drink beer and do fuck all while Dad swears his head off.
Anyway here is what I’m dealing with …
Hello People !!! Today was absolutely fantabulous !! I got up after an awesome sleep , drove my new (old) Suzuki swift 93 edition ( named Princess ) that my fantabulous boyfriend purchased for me on Friday ( he is now in charge of all motor vehicle purchases ever since the disaster we call the Honda civic that I bought last year and drove for 3 weeks before it broke…not my fault by the way – more about that in the future …)
So anyway I’m driving to work in my new
race car and made it there 10 min early due to driving a car that actually does the bloody speed limit ( the Troopy took 5 mins to get to 100kms an hour ! ). I packed all the free shit into Black Betty and went to do my radio cross as usual. Now for the best part : I drive back to the station to drop the van off and pick up the Princess. Before I left I stopped in to see the brekky presenters Tom and Sarah when shit went down ..:
Me : Hey guys all went well , I guess Ill catch ya tomorrow
Sarah: Actually we wanted to tell you something
Me: (thinking fuck here it goes again , I’m fired ): Oh right sweet whats up?
Sarah: We were just talking about how you’re getting really good at this ..
Tom : Yeah your flow is heaps better and its sounds more natural ..
Me : *aw shucks guys * grinning like the Cheshire cat !
I practice every script 5 times before I say it but lately I have it memorized so well I have started to ad lib etc and obviously its paying off. When I first begun I didn’t think I would last due to my excessive swearing in real life ( I tone it down a bit for my blog ‘cos hey I want people to read it ! ) I really wanted this job so I practiced hard and look ! Practice is starting to make (nearly) perfect !