newspaper

Horny Hogs Terrorizing the Territory !!


If you were to believe the NT news that is ! I must admit where would this blog be without them ? Last week it was spa bathing buffalo , this week its a couch lovin’ pig !

As always when I arrive for work each morning at Hot 100 I collect the morning papers to hand out to all the freebie huntin’ masses of Darwin. I flick through the paper while I wait for the station to call for my location . Today when I got to page 3 I absolutley pissed myself laughing ….

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This furniture lovin’ piggy was spotted yesterday in a suburb of Darwin having sex with an armchair in the middle of the road. Now this sort of thing happens all the time out in the bush , but Darwin is a ‘capital city’ as one witness told the paper ( calling Darwin a city might be going a little far – maybe one day but I’m pretty sure to be a city you need to have shitloads of people living there). Last year the NT news ran a story about Horny Harry , a pet pig living in the community of Gunbalanya , NT who had a loving relationship with wheelie bins and thinks he is a camp dog … Harry’s owner caught the piglet 2 or 3 years ago as a pet for his daughter. He maintains Harry is just an ordinary pig who sometimes knocks over bins . Another resident added in “yeah and then he fucks ’em”. Charming !

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Harry Trotter and his pack of adoring camp dogs PIC : MICHAEL FRANCHI www.ntnews.com.au

Categories: bush, Darwin, entertainment, funny, Humor, News, newspaper, Only in the Territory, radio, WTF | Tags: , , , , , , , , , | Leave a comment

The Wildlife Around Here Are Starting To Get A Bit Fancy …..


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Todays front page of the NT News www.ntnews.com.au

The northern Territory is a magical place full of awesome landscapes , beautiful sunsets , golden opportunities and some fucking crazy animals.

The other day , a couple in Howard Springs , just south of Darwin , woke to find a water buffalo roaming around their property. Despite being pretty bloody dangerous , this buff seemed quiet tame and the lady of the house was able to pat the beast .. well until it started headbutting her as what she hoped was a sign of affection ….

After a while they had to head off to work and assumed the Buffalo had left the property by the time they arrived home.

Wrong.

They arrived home that evening to find the Buff had taken a fancy to their spa !

This seems to happen a lot up here , animals thinking that if its good enough for humans then they should get a go too . Earlier this year I wrote a post about a croc who broke into the living room of a Darwin based family and 2 years ago a croc was found in another family’s outdoor spa.

So the moral of the story is be very wary entering your home or your pool if you live in the Territory – you never know what might be lurking in there !

Categories: Australian, bush, crocs, Darwin, entertainment, funny, Humor, News, newspaper, Only in the Territory, WTF | Tags: , , , , , , , , | 3 Comments

Update on the Cracker up The Clacker – And a Croc gets a Taste of His Own Medicine …… Just Another Day in The Territory !


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Pic : wallcoo.net

I thought I owed it to you guys to bring you the conclusion to the story of the bloke who shoved a lit fire cracker in his bum not so long ago. It was reported in the NT News today that he would not be charged for the incident as the police feel he has suffered enough – for once I agree with them. I am really thinking about contacting this guy for a kel style interview but I’m not sure how he will react – apparently he is not keen on any interviews about the firecracker in the bum thing. Not sure why …

Moving right along we had another classic NT news story today. The headline was – I kid you not – ” Man bites croc on snout after croc bites another mans head”  Some men were fishing in croc infested waters and one was in the water doing god knows what ( I’m not into fishing , can you tell ??) when a croc leaped out of the water and grabbed him by the head pulling him under the waves. The rest of the story involves one of his mates biting the reptile on the snout whilst his other mate stabbed the croc repeatedly with a screw driver as the croc kept losing and then regaining his grip on the poor fisherman who was in the middle of all the drama. In the end the croc gave up and swam off to eat a barramundi or something and the injured fisherman lived to see another day , surprisingly with all his limbs intact.

Just another day in the Northern Territory !

Categories: Australian, boat, bush, crocs, Darwin, entertainment, fishing, funny, Humor, News, newspaper, Only in the Territory, random, WTF | Tags: , , , , , | 1 Comment

Another Cracker of A Story


 

The Territory news has spent the last 2 days keeping us informed of some very important news. Nothing to do with the Olympics by the way , much more newsworthy stuff than that ..

Maybe instead of trying to explain this amazing , cant-believe-its-not-global news I’ll just show you the front page of today’s paper :

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Yep , this guy is the territory’s latest candidate for a Darwin award.

In his own words 23 yr old Alex Bowden told the NT news ” I just had a few beers with the boys and let off a few fire crackers ……. And then I decided to put one in my arse”.

What a bloody great idea ? Why the hell have I never thought of doing this party trick myself …
Anyway he did let the NT news know that there wasn’t any major damage “It didn’t burn my balls or my back , just my fingers and my arse”.
He said he did not bleed and could walk afterwards .. Oh and it was also reported in the article that he didn’t cry but he did say fuck a few times.

Gotta love the NT news. Meanwhile I have no idea what is happening in London apart from the 4 Aussie blokes coming 4th in the relay swimming heat and crying about it. Hey guys , try having a fire cracker shoved up your arse !!

This is your nutty reporter signing off , have an awesome week people xx

Source http://www.ntnews.com.au

 

Categories: Australian, Darwin, entertainment, funny, Humor, News, newspaper, Only in the Territory, Photography, WTF | Tags: , , , , , , , , , , , | 19 Comments

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