Posts Tagged With: humour


The Australian Outback is full of hidden treasures .. The opal fields in Coober Pedy , the inland sea in South Australia , the waterfalls in Litchfield National Park …. Annnnnnnnd a penis shaped termite mound on the side of the Arnhem Highway

penis.jpegPic by NT News photographer Elise Derwin

You can read original story by NT News here

 

 

 

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Categories: Arnhem Land, bush, entertainment, funny, Humor, humour, Only in the Territory, WTF | Tags: , , , | Leave a comment

Writing My Way To Insanity ….


Its official. Writing a book is a fucking nightmare. I have been in this creative process for nearly 6 months now and its doing my head in ! My major issue is every time I think I’m nearly done I have another idea or I see something that could be written better or I change my mind about the content of an entire chapter and thank God I never sent the original version to anyone important … Its like having a baby except having a baby is a million times easier. I say this because most of the outcome when you have a baby is up to genetics and luck so the outcome is really out of your control, however if this book sucks it’s all my fault and I had total control over that. Talk about pressure.

The good news is the hard part – writing the actual stories down – is pretty much over and now its just a case of filling in a few gaps , editing and making sure the overall tone of the book stays the same. I’m learning a lot and it’s actually fun once I get into it. The problem is , how the hell will I ever be able to say I’m done ?? I can’t stop fiddling with it ! I leave a chapter for a week , go back and see a million ways I can make it better. I guess I’ll know when its time to leave it alone and hand it over to the big scary publishing world. They better fucking like it !! 😉

So that’s what I’ve been doing when I should have been updating my poor neglected blog with hectic , insane outback stories. I apologize for being so boring and promise I’ll be bringing back my special brand of crazy real soon …. Xx Kel

Ps. I thought I better post a funny pic to make up for my shitty blogging .. so here you go , a sheep on a motorbike !

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Categories: Australian, baby, bush, entertainment, funny, Humor, humour, Photography | Tags: , , , , , , , , , , | 2 Comments

Top Headlines So Far For 2013 ….


 

Since , as I explained in my last post , I am officially brain-dead due to pregnancy and extreme heat I have decided to entertain you all with my favorite headlines from the Northern Territory so far this year ….

First up , when watermelons can be dangerous ……

 

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After arguing with the bus driver over the fare , the man was kicked off the bus but not before he smashed a watermelon over the bus driver’s head in front of his 4 kids who I’m guessing also missed out on the bus ride thanks to their awesome Dad …..

 

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But the next day the bus driver had the last laugh !

 

Also on the subject of using food as weapons , a pensioner who had his parking skills criticized by a truck driver (who according to the NT news had commented “nice park cockhead “) lost the plot and threw his iced coffee at the bloke before laying into him with his fists . The pensioner was charged with assault after he contacted the truckies workplace to complain .. maybe he should have kept his mouth shut because he was the one who ended up in court with a 2 month suspended sentence ….

 

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Maybe all this aggro is due to the extreme heat we have been dealing with for the last 5 months … I will leave you all with this article which justifies my laziness and the general public’s ‘Mango Madness’ …. We are goin’ troppo up here in the tropics !!!!!

 

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I will be back soon with some more crazy Territory shizzle , hopefully we get a Croc story this week its been a while !

Xx Kel

*Articles from http://www.ntnews.com.au

Categories: cops, Darwin, entertainment, funny, Humor, humour, News, newspaper, Only in the Territory, WTF | Tags: , , , , , , , , , , , | 1 Comment

Crazy Pic of The Week


Crazy Pic of The Week

OK so lets just ignore the fact that I’m not very good at updating my crazy pics weekly and just appreciate the Australian Outback s version of Bikini Babes …

Categories: Australian, bush, entertainment, funny, Humor, humour, Photography, road trips, WTF | Tags: , , , , , , , , , | 4 Comments

Dinky the Singing Dingo


Thanks to australiantouristpublications.com.au

*pic thanks to australiantouristpublications.com.au

While I was on my road trip from Darwin to Albury a few weeks ago I stopped at many random roadhouses in the middle of the Outback. It was at one of these roadhouses that I met Dinky , Australia’s most talented dingo. Dinky not only can sing , he also plays the piano while belting out his tunes . I was lucky enough to have stopped in Stuart Well NT at the same time as the daily tourist bus so I got to capture this furry superstar on film.  It was one of the more out there experiences I’ve had since I moved to the Territory I must admit ! ( Bloody funny too 😉 )

For more on Dinky , check out this article http://www.australiantraveller.com/alice-springs/the-singing-dingo-alice-springs/

the one thing I must point out is that when the article was written it mentions Dinky is 4 yrs old – he’s a tad bit older than that now so hurry up to Stuart Well and check him out before he gets too old to play the piano !!!!

Categories: animals, Aussie pubs, Australian, bush, entertainment, funny, Humor, humour, Only in the Territory, road trips, Travel, Travel, video | Tags: , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , | 3 Comments

Just Busy Crossing A Continent and Stuff ….


Last Tuesday the 13th of November I decided to go for a little drive to see my parents . 4 days later I got there .
I wrote a little while ago about not being able to find anywhere for Chaos and Mayhem to spend Christmas. I called every boarding kennel in town only to be told there was no room ( already this was starting to take on a Christmassy theme !! ) . So my next option was to try to get them on the plane with me as baggage ( I wouldn’t tell them that to their faces though .. ) This was possible to do but not at the price they were going to charge me … so my last option was to drive me and the two poochies down to Albury NSW myself – in a 93 model Suzuki Swift hatchback.

Making the best of a not so ideal situation I  entered us all in the Triple J / ABC Open Road Trip Relay which is taking place over summer Australia wide. Since I was driving through the middle of the Australian desert I had Queen of The Desert car stickers and T-shirts made up by an awesome company in Darwin called Gecko Signs  (you can check out their website here ) .

The day before I left I was contacted by Triple J and ABC to talk about my trip and they asked me to film some legs of my journey and edit it with a thing called time-lapse ( I can turn a computer on , type and even Google stuff but that my friends is as tech savvy as Kel gets .. ). So Dave stuck the camera on the dashboard for me with Velcro and I recorded the Stuart Highway from Katherine onwards until I ran into technical difficulties just past Coober Pedy and had to abort the mission. So for anyone who is interested , I have hours of fascinating footage of road , sky and desert.

I did however get some great stuff from the random roadhouses on the side of the lonely old Stuart Highway :

Posing with my old mate .. see if you can find me !

I wrote about this particular pub months ago in this post . I mentioned at the time it has the highest bar in the Northern Territory .. here is my ‘proof’

The highest bar in the Northern Territory

A service station at Wycliffe Well , UFO capital of Australia ( I kid you not )

Wycliffe well .. UFO capital of Australia

And in Stuart Well I found Dinky the Singing dingo who is also a very talented piano player – I have a video clip for you guys but this will be posted separately – this K9 deserves his very own post !!

*The article is about Donna the ‘hearing’ guide dingo being brought up to the NT ( by train .. she had her own seat ! ) to meet Dinky , the singing dingo .

We couldn’t resist getting into the fun and games at the last pub ( or the first depending on which direction you are headed ! ) in the Northern Territory ( Kulgera Roadhouse/pub/caravan park ) …

Chaos , Mayhem and Kel

I also met a few interesting characters on the way including a chap from Coober Pedy who was actually involved in shooting ‘ Priscilla , Queen of The Desert years ago when it was filmed in the outback . He loved my car and we have kept in touch via Facebook since. I also interviewed a young fellow from Mataranka for the Road Trip relay comp but after interviewing him I’m not quite sure he actually was a local .. thoughts that were pretty much confirmed as I ran into them at nearly every petrol station after Mataranka until I hit Port Augusta in South Australia . Oh well at least he pretended on film which is the main thing 😉

* My ‘stalkers’ outside a Coober Pedy servo.

Unlike the last time I crossed the country when I had to sleep in my troopy on the side of the road , this time around I booked hotel and caravan park accommodation along the way . Again the highlight was Coober Pedy where I slept in an ‘ underground camp site ‘ which was really just a motel bed in a cave :

There was also little cave like spots for people to pitch a tent for the night .. underground .. yep made no bloody sense to me either but apparently that’s how they roll in the desert ..

I thought this particular tent was a display of what it was like in the old days so I was snapping away happily at 630am until I heard a loud cough from inside the tent .. woops …

And finally the last pic of this little motel tour , the front entrance to our digs

This was my last night in the desert before I crossed over to NSW and Victoria , spending my last night on the road in a little town called Broken Hill. It was a great trip and the dogs did a great job of not pissing me off too much .. Chaos has been all over Australia ( except Western Australia and Tasmania ) but this was little Mayhem’s first trip anywhere .. she was a natural ..

* Maisie finds her comfort zone in the car.

In between naps she would climb up behind the back seat and launch herself kamikaze style at Chaos’s head . It kept them amused …..

Until next time !!

Cheers

Kel xx

Categories: animals, Aussie pubs, Australian, bush, cars, entertainment, funny, Humor, humour, lifestyle, Photography, random, road trips, Travel, WTF | Tags: , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , | 3 Comments

Glutton for Punishment


Glutton for Punishment.

The Gumnut Kid

 

The latest news about the lil gumnut for anyone wanting to hear the crazy observations of a pregnant kel 😉 Xx ( also , baby bump pic woo hoo ! lol )

Categories: entertainment, humour, lifestyle, random | Tags: , , , | Leave a comment

Crazy Pic of The Week – A Chaos special


 

Chaos dealing with the heat of the ‘buildup’ – yes he managed to get his whole head underwater the crazy bugger !!

(That was the day I decided walking him before 5 pm is not a great idea )

Categories: animals, entertainment, funny, Humor, humour, Photography, random | Tags: , , , , , , , | Leave a comment

I Am Not The Animal Whisperer .. Can Someone Explain This to Them ???


Ahhhh real bush living , it doesn’t get much better than this . My new house is doing me the world of good , and I don’t regret moving out here at all .. Its just some things take more getting used to than others …

I have become the female Aussie version of Dr Dolittle . Indoors or outdoors every time I turn around a little non-human face is watching me. I have a house full of geckos , a toilet full of green tree frogs – and occasionally the odd spider , a possum or two in the roof and the biggest fattest cane toads in Australia. A few days ago I was walking  Chaos and spotted my first snake out here which was a bit ironic as I was walking through the nudist camp next door – my mother of all people was the first one to turn that story into a rude joke . I go to have a shower and there is usually a tree frog hiding under the taps ( I suspect as I am starting to look like a tree frog myself he may be perving on me …)

I don’t mind him apart from the fact he moves between the toilet and the shower which makes him a bit of a weirdo but at least he isn’t a toad …

The cane toads can always be relied upon to show up when you least expect it , like when you grab your shoe off the ground and a toad the size of Dave’s hand jumps out from underneath ( at 5am in the morning this is a better wake up call than coffee).

Apart from the nudist’s , my other neighbor’s are buffalo and walking around the block has never been so intimidating. They are apparently ‘tame’ but that doesn’t make me feel any better – just last week a Territory man was gored to death by his own pet bull. And they just stare at you – they make me feel like I’m the one with horns growing out of my head !

So I did what anyone would do when they are surrounded by animals – I got another one ! Introducing Mayhem …

* Little Maisy
Now there is a method to my madness , I bought Mayhem ( Maisy) to keep Chaos company because when this little Gumnut Kid gets here he will not be getting as much attention . I thought a friend would be the perfect solution – I was wrong. For the last few days he has been treating her as if she doesn’t exist. So I have 2 dogs that want my undivided attention instead of amusing each other !!! It will get better I have been told – apparently male dogs aren’t that interested in puppies so hopefully he’ll snap out of his attitude by the time the baby arrives.

I have to finish this post now as Maisy has just regurgitated earplugs all over the floor and I need to clean it up before she walks it through the house ….

Categories: animals, bush, funny, Humor, humour, lifestyle, Only in the Territory, Photography, random | Tags: , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , | 4 Comments

Donuts on a diet , Payphones and Blonde Moment # 357855


A common Telstra phone box

A common Telstra phone box (Photo credit: Wikipedia)

Donuts on a diet , Payphones and Blonde Moment # 357855

Today started off great. I woke up early , had enough time to actually enjoy my coffee and for once had a hassle free drive to the Hot 100 office. I let my self in with my newly acquired key (up until 2 days ago I had to knock on the back door for ages before anyone heard me and let me in). I loaded the van with milk , newspapers and free passes to every bloody event happening in Darwin this weekend. I then made my way to the bakery to pick up the donuts and cakes that taunt me every morning . I have to give them away along with all the other free stuff and no I can’t even sneak any for myself because I am a girl so of course I’m on a permanent diet (well I try but lets face it my love affair with steak and red wine always see’s me falling off the wagon )

The temptation I face on a daily basis .. It’s not easy I tell ya 😉 pic: fanpop.com

I managed to get all of this done with plenty of time to spare so I made my way out to the furthest suburb from the city – which coincidentally is also where I live so I gave myself a pat on the back for going so far out of my way not once but twice 😉

Any-hoo I arrived to my destination with 15 mins to spare so I had plenty of time to read over my new script and organize all the free shit. With 7 mins before going to air I went to get my phone so I was ready when they called. I looked through my bag – no phone .. Ok don’t panic I told myself , It’s probably in the back of the van. I searched the entire van , still no phone …………

FAAAAARRRRRKKK was pretty much all I could say for the next 5 mins as I drove at a million miles an hour to the nearest pay phone. By this time I should have been on air doing my little spiel but no , instead I was at a pay phone calling Telstra directory trying to get the number for the studio. The first number I got no one would pick up. The next number I called was some old dude’s home phone and finally on the third call Sarah from Hot 100 answered .. thank god. So I did my cross this morning from a pay phone outside the post office . Yep like a pro 😉

When I got back into the station I dropped in to see Tom and Sarah and we had a bit of a laugh about the whole thing .. Tom said he wanted to put this song on air in my honor …

Categories: Darwin, entertainment, funny, humour, radio, WTF | Tags: , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , | 4 Comments

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