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Posts Tagged With: nature

Despite The Name , Sometimes The Bush Really Pisses Me Off


There are so many things I have to write about at the moment. As the end of ‘wet season’ comes to an end ( what a joke , I think it rained 5 times ?! ) the crocs up here in the topend are moving around more and can be found just about anywhere you turn. So there have been ‘ croc attacks’ ( one guy got bitten on the head apparently , but still survived to tell the NT news all about it another guy appeared on the front page last week after he was ‘attacked’ by a croc which was all of 1 meter long ..  ) and  heaps of croc sightings . But I have been too busy dealing with my own life threatening situations to think up witty blog posts to go with the above news stories.

It all started with this:

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Now we don’t normally go around shooting snakes , but this bugger was headed for Chaos’s bed and the outside loo so he had to go . Luckily for us Maisy is more switched on than Chaos and went banana’s when she saw the snake. Chaos just kept snorin’ away in ignorant bliss …..

Unfortunately Maisy wasn’t so bright a few nights later when what I thought was a bikini string came to life on my kitchen floor

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I had just put Marli down and walked into the kitchen on my way to the toilet. I noticed a shiny looking string on the tiles and thought it had come out of a dress or bikini top. But something made me stop when I went to pick it up. So I stood on the other side of the kitchen and threw random crap from the kitchen bench at it until it jumped and started slithering towards me with its head raised looking a tad bit pissed off ….. This is the point when I realized just because I live in the bush doesn’t mean I am any good at dealing with situations that involve venomous animals. So I ran outside in my knickers and called Dave who was never going to be able to help because he was on the other side of the country at a wedding. So I yelled at him for 5 minutes , hung up , called a girlfriend who had just finished a massive Sunday session and could not legally drive anywhere. Out of options I called the pub up the road and luckily for me the barmaid felt sorry for me and sent her boyfriend over to get rid of the snake ( which turned out to be called a Bandy Bandy ).

The boyfriend tried to remove the snake without killing it but by this stage it was well and truly pissed off and ended up getting decapitated.

Not even two weeks later my mother flew up to help out with Marli and after a shopping trip we were walking across the lawn when I noticed the stick I was about to step on had eyes …. My Mum was so brave , she grabbed a crow bar and smacked it over the back but we’re not sure if she killed it or not because it freaked out and headed for the garden bed … I haven’t seen it since …..

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Categories: animals, Australian, bush, crocs, Darwin, entertainment, funny, Humor, humour, News, newspaper, Only in the Territory, Photography, WTF | Tags: , , , , , , , , , , , , , | 2 Comments

I Am Not The Animal Whisperer .. Can Someone Explain This to Them ???


Ahhhh real bush living , it doesn’t get much better than this . My new house is doing me the world of good , and I don’t regret moving out here at all .. Its just some things take more getting used to than others …

I have become the female Aussie version of Dr Dolittle . Indoors or outdoors every time I turn around a little non-human face is watching me. I have a house full of geckos , a toilet full of green tree frogs – and occasionally the odd spider , a possum or two in the roof and the biggest fattest cane toads in Australia. A few days ago I was walking  Chaos and spotted my first snake out here which was a bit ironic as I was walking through the nudist camp next door – my mother of all people was the first one to turn that story into a rude joke . I go to have a shower and there is usually a tree frog hiding under the taps ( I suspect as I am starting to look like a tree frog myself he may be perving on me …)

I don’t mind him apart from the fact he moves between the toilet and the shower which makes him a bit of a weirdo but at least he isn’t a toad …

The cane toads can always be relied upon to show up when you least expect it , like when you grab your shoe off the ground and a toad the size of Dave’s hand jumps out from underneath ( at 5am in the morning this is a better wake up call than coffee).

Apart from the nudist’s , my other neighbor’s are buffalo and walking around the block has never been so intimidating. They are apparently ‘tame’ but that doesn’t make me feel any better – just last week a Territory man was gored to death by his own pet bull. And they just stare at you – they make me feel like I’m the one with horns growing out of my head !

So I did what anyone would do when they are surrounded by animals – I got another one ! Introducing Mayhem …

* Little Maisy
Now there is a method to my madness , I bought Mayhem ( Maisy) to keep Chaos company because when this little Gumnut Kid gets here he will not be getting as much attention . I thought a friend would be the perfect solution – I was wrong. For the last few days he has been treating her as if she doesn’t exist. So I have 2 dogs that want my undivided attention instead of amusing each other !!! It will get better I have been told – apparently male dogs aren’t that interested in puppies so hopefully he’ll snap out of his attitude by the time the baby arrives.

I have to finish this post now as Maisy has just regurgitated earplugs all over the floor and I need to clean it up before she walks it through the house ….

Categories: animals, bush, funny, Humor, humour, lifestyle, Only in the Territory, Photography, random | Tags: , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , | 4 Comments

Crazy Pic of The Week


 

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Dave and I went for a bush – bash in his ‘cruiser through our new property .. And came face to face with this goofy looking termite mound

Pic : Taken by us ! 🙂

 

Categories: Australian, bush, entertainment, funny, Humor, humour, Only in the Territory, Photography, random, WTF | Tags: , , , , , , | 8 Comments

Up The Stick In The Sticks …….. Pregnancy Bush Style


 

Hi Guys ! I have spent the last few days moving ….. to my dream house !! For those of you who have just started reading my blog , or may not remember I wrote a post in May about a house belonging to a mate of Dave’s which I fell in love with ( the house , not Dave’s mate !). I have reblogged the post so you can check out my new digs which actually is just out of Berry Springs , not Batchelor although Batchelor is just up the road 😉
The house is on 50 acres so I can be as loud as I like ! And I may as well make my second announcement now , we have lots of room for our new additions to play !! That s right , Dave and I are expecting our first rugrat ! And to keep Chaos happy we are also getting a puppy which Im thinking about naming Mayhem …. So the house will very soon become a bit of a circus but I couldn’t be happier with the way things have turned out although whoever said being pregnant is fun is an IDIOT – Or has not been pregnant in the Darwin September heat !

 

Kels Gone Bush

Last week my I went out to a small town called Batchelor which is near Litchfeild National Park  about 50km from Darwin. It is also near a town called Rum Jungle where my partner Dave reckon s he should live.

I love going out to Batchelor because it means I get to visit one of my favorite houses which belongs to a mate of Dave’s. The house was originally just a wooden frame with a tin roof and a few rocks here and there posing as walls . Since Dave’s mate bought it he has gathered more rocks and built the rest of the walls , cementing them in to give the place a cave like effect. Its awesome , I hope one day we can build something similar. Then again I change my mind every time I see a new house I like .. I guess I’m going…

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Categories: Australian, bush, entertainment, lifestyle, Photography | Tags: , , , , , | 2 Comments

Crazy Pic of The Week


 

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A saltwater crocodile takes on a helicopter – according to the website I found this on the crewman said to the pilot “Keep your doors closed , I think we have a problem !”

You think ??

Pic thanks to http://www.2dayfm.com.au

 

Categories: crocs, entertainment, funny, Humor, Machinery, motor sports, Photography, WTF | Tags: , , , , , | 3 Comments

2 Girls and a Bundy Bear Go Bush !!!


Yesterday was awesome. First of all we went to one of my favorite places – the Buely Rockhole , Litchfeild National Park. Secondly I went with some cool people – my boyfriend Dave and my flatmate Jodie. And the best bit – we took shitloads of vodka and rum – always makes every occasion more enjoyable !!

So I can’t tell you much about the day except at one point we decided to impersonate Swedish backpackers and posed topless with a funny road sign (I’m pretty sure  I also tried to use it as a stripper pole) – a set of pics I’m definitely NOT showing you guys !

Here are some PG rated pics 😉

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Attempting to cross a waterfall after a few vodka lime and soda’s .. looks like Dave is coming to my rescue .. and yes , I nearly fell in

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Nah its all good Dave , I can do it alone …

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Oh alright then I will let you help me …. oh by the way that is not coffee in that cup – I’m guessing a lot of by standers would have been wondering why A) my coffee seems to be lasting so long and B) Why , with every sip , I seem to giggle more .. To be honest the reason I was using a coffee cup instead of a normal one was because I needed something with a lid to stop me spilling my vodka everywhere which is standard practice for drunk-Kel 😉

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The water was crystal clear ..

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The view from our VIP section – we climbed the fence to get our own private rockpool. If anyone came too close we just scared them away with our craziness – plus Dave resembles that big bloke from Harry Potter so just seeing him alone is enough for people to keep their distance.

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The only picture taken with this sign suitable for my blog .. or any social media site actually ..

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Goodbye Litchfeild , we’ll be back soon !!!

Categories: Australian, bush, entertainment, funny, Humor, lifestyle, Only in the Territory, Photography, random, road trips, Travel | Tags: , , , , , , , , , , , , | 5 Comments

Forget Angry Birds , We Have Fire Birds !!!


 

This is a video clip I took when I was on the Adelaide River Cruise with my brother. As I mentioned in my last post  the Territory is home to a species of birds who like to spread fire by picking up burning twigs and dropping them in another area. Check out the commentary  , these birds really are cheeky little buggers …

 

Video taken by ME 🙂

Categories: Arnhem Land, Australian, birds, bush, entertainment, fire, funny, Only in the Territory, random, Travel, video, WTF | Tags: , , , , , , , , , , , , , | 4 Comments

In the End , the Dogs Won The War


 

 

Over the past month 9 pet dogs in the Daly River township mysteriously disappeared without a trace. Aliens have been ruled out now , as it has been discovered an evil 4.4 meter crocodile had taken a liking to people’s pets. And not because these dogs were wandering around a river bank , nope , this croc was that cheeky a bloke spotted him one night lying under a mango tree in his backyard ! When I first moved to the NT I remember asking if crocodiles hung out in people’s yards and I was laughed at. Well this is the second report of this happening in the last 6 months – remember in March I blogged about the family that woke up to a salty in their lounge room ?? So the person who laughed at the thought  is probably not the right person to advise any newbie to the NT about croc safety …

I personally wanted to hunt down this horrible animal and kill him myself ( not that I have any idea how to – aim and shoot ??) but the experts bet me to it. Yesterday was a victory for the dogs of Daly River as the croc was trapped and caught by rangers. You can check out the video here.

On the way to the croc farm the rangers had to get fuel and pulled into the servo , croc and all …….

 

Pic http://www.ninemsn.com.au

Yep , only in the Territory ……..

 

 

Categories: Arnhem Land, Australian, bush, crocs, entertainment, Only in the Territory, random, WTF | Tags: , , , , , , , , , , | 5 Comments

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