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Posts Tagged With: Recreation

Despite The Name , Sometimes The Bush Really Pisses Me Off


There are so many things I have to write about at the moment. As the end of ‘wet season’ comes to an end ( what a joke , I think it rained 5 times ?! ) the crocs up here in the topend are moving around more and can be found just about anywhere you turn. So there have been ‘ croc attacks’ ( one guy got bitten on the head apparently , but still survived to tell the NT news all about it another guy appeared on the front page last week after he was ‘attacked’ by a croc which was all of 1 meter long ..  ) and  heaps of croc sightings . But I have been too busy dealing with my own life threatening situations to think up witty blog posts to go with the above news stories.

It all started with this:

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Now we don’t normally go around shooting snakes , but this bugger was headed for Chaos’s bed and the outside loo so he had to go . Luckily for us Maisy is more switched on than Chaos and went banana’s when she saw the snake. Chaos just kept snorin’ away in ignorant bliss …..

Unfortunately Maisy wasn’t so bright a few nights later when what I thought was a bikini string came to life on my kitchen floor

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I had just put Marli down and walked into the kitchen on my way to the toilet. I noticed a shiny looking string on the tiles and thought it had come out of a dress or bikini top. But something made me stop when I went to pick it up. So I stood on the other side of the kitchen and threw random crap from the kitchen bench at it until it jumped and started slithering towards me with its head raised looking a tad bit pissed off ….. This is the point when I realized just because I live in the bush doesn’t mean I am any good at dealing with situations that involve venomous animals. So I ran outside in my knickers and called Dave who was never going to be able to help because he was on the other side of the country at a wedding. So I yelled at him for 5 minutes , hung up , called a girlfriend who had just finished a massive Sunday session and could not legally drive anywhere. Out of options I called the pub up the road and luckily for me the barmaid felt sorry for me and sent her boyfriend over to get rid of the snake ( which turned out to be called a Bandy Bandy ).

The boyfriend tried to remove the snake without killing it but by this stage it was well and truly pissed off and ended up getting decapitated.

Not even two weeks later my mother flew up to help out with Marli and after a shopping trip we were walking across the lawn when I noticed the stick I was about to step on had eyes …. My Mum was so brave , she grabbed a crow bar and smacked it over the back but we’re not sure if she killed it or not because it freaked out and headed for the garden bed … I haven’t seen it since …..

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Categories: animals, Australian, bush, crocs, Darwin, entertainment, funny, Humor, humour, News, newspaper, Only in the Territory, Photography, WTF | Tags: , , , , , , , , , , , , , | 2 Comments

Christmas in the City


I have been out of the ‘bush’ for 6 weeks now .. and still hate the traffic !! I arrived in Melbourne over a week ago to start the Christmas celebrations with my family(s) . Over a week and a half we celebrate with 3 Christmas dinners – I’m going to look like a stuffed Turkey by New Years Eve !! As I haven’t been in the Territory for 6 weeks I haven’t had much to report on Kels Gone Bush but I can tell you if you are trying to get in or out of East Arnhem Land this week you will have to take a boat with you just in case !! Yep it is officially wet season and the rains are a comin !! Dave was supposed to hit Darwin last night after leaving Gove NT yesterday in our land cruiser ute with his tinny on the back. I received a frantic call from one of his mates this morning , who told me that Dave had called him at 1am from the satellite phone and before he could figure out what Dave was saying the phone died. Awesome news when you are in Melbourne and can do absolutely nothing about the situation ! After calling the bush police and sending a few Facebook messages to locals in Gove we finally heard from him at 2pm as he was arriving in Katherine NT. He thought we were both bloody idiots for worrying but even though he is one of the most capable males I have met , he is still human and those river crossings are not the safest in Australia – if only because of the flash flooding and oodles of crocodiles !! Any-hoo he made it out alive which is all I care about at this point.

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* Taken on the central Arnhem Hwy last year for the NT News http://www.ntnews.com.au

I will be flying back to the Territory on Boxing day and cant wait to bring you all another year of crazy sh*t from the outback 😉 I have big plans for Kels Gone Bush next year and am hoping that the baby motivates me more than stops me from carrying them out.  Until then I wish you all a VERY Merry Christmas , and a safe one … Bring on 2013 it is going to be even bigger and better !!!! Love to everyone Xx Kel

Categories: boat, bush, crocs, Darwin, entertainment, funny, Humor, humour, newspaper, Only in the Territory, road trips | Tags: , , , , , , , , | 3 Comments

Dinky the Singing Dingo


Thanks to australiantouristpublications.com.au

*pic thanks to australiantouristpublications.com.au

While I was on my road trip from Darwin to Albury a few weeks ago I stopped at many random roadhouses in the middle of the Outback. It was at one of these roadhouses that I met Dinky , Australia’s most talented dingo. Dinky not only can sing , he also plays the piano while belting out his tunes . I was lucky enough to have stopped in Stuart Well NT at the same time as the daily tourist bus so I got to capture this furry superstar on film.  It was one of the more out there experiences I’ve had since I moved to the Territory I must admit ! ( Bloody funny too 😉 )

For more on Dinky , check out this article http://www.australiantraveller.com/alice-springs/the-singing-dingo-alice-springs/

the one thing I must point out is that when the article was written it mentions Dinky is 4 yrs old – he’s a tad bit older than that now so hurry up to Stuart Well and check him out before he gets too old to play the piano !!!!

Categories: animals, Aussie pubs, Australian, bush, entertainment, funny, Humor, humour, Only in the Territory, road trips, Travel, Travel, video | Tags: , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , | 3 Comments

Just Busy Crossing A Continent and Stuff ….


Last Tuesday the 13th of November I decided to go for a little drive to see my parents . 4 days later I got there .
I wrote a little while ago about not being able to find anywhere for Chaos and Mayhem to spend Christmas. I called every boarding kennel in town only to be told there was no room ( already this was starting to take on a Christmassy theme !! ) . So my next option was to try to get them on the plane with me as baggage ( I wouldn’t tell them that to their faces though .. ) This was possible to do but not at the price they were going to charge me … so my last option was to drive me and the two poochies down to Albury NSW myself – in a 93 model Suzuki Swift hatchback.

Making the best of a not so ideal situation I  entered us all in the Triple J / ABC Open Road Trip Relay which is taking place over summer Australia wide. Since I was driving through the middle of the Australian desert I had Queen of The Desert car stickers and T-shirts made up by an awesome company in Darwin called Gecko Signs  (you can check out their website here ) .

The day before I left I was contacted by Triple J and ABC to talk about my trip and they asked me to film some legs of my journey and edit it with a thing called time-lapse ( I can turn a computer on , type and even Google stuff but that my friends is as tech savvy as Kel gets .. ). So Dave stuck the camera on the dashboard for me with Velcro and I recorded the Stuart Highway from Katherine onwards until I ran into technical difficulties just past Coober Pedy and had to abort the mission. So for anyone who is interested , I have hours of fascinating footage of road , sky and desert.

I did however get some great stuff from the random roadhouses on the side of the lonely old Stuart Highway :

Posing with my old mate .. see if you can find me !

I wrote about this particular pub months ago in this post . I mentioned at the time it has the highest bar in the Northern Territory .. here is my ‘proof’

The highest bar in the Northern Territory

A service station at Wycliffe Well , UFO capital of Australia ( I kid you not )

Wycliffe well .. UFO capital of Australia

And in Stuart Well I found Dinky the Singing dingo who is also a very talented piano player – I have a video clip for you guys but this will be posted separately – this K9 deserves his very own post !!

*The article is about Donna the ‘hearing’ guide dingo being brought up to the NT ( by train .. she had her own seat ! ) to meet Dinky , the singing dingo .

We couldn’t resist getting into the fun and games at the last pub ( or the first depending on which direction you are headed ! ) in the Northern Territory ( Kulgera Roadhouse/pub/caravan park ) …

Chaos , Mayhem and Kel

I also met a few interesting characters on the way including a chap from Coober Pedy who was actually involved in shooting ‘ Priscilla , Queen of The Desert years ago when it was filmed in the outback . He loved my car and we have kept in touch via Facebook since. I also interviewed a young fellow from Mataranka for the Road Trip relay comp but after interviewing him I’m not quite sure he actually was a local .. thoughts that were pretty much confirmed as I ran into them at nearly every petrol station after Mataranka until I hit Port Augusta in South Australia . Oh well at least he pretended on film which is the main thing 😉

* My ‘stalkers’ outside a Coober Pedy servo.

Unlike the last time I crossed the country when I had to sleep in my troopy on the side of the road , this time around I booked hotel and caravan park accommodation along the way . Again the highlight was Coober Pedy where I slept in an ‘ underground camp site ‘ which was really just a motel bed in a cave :

There was also little cave like spots for people to pitch a tent for the night .. underground .. yep made no bloody sense to me either but apparently that’s how they roll in the desert ..

I thought this particular tent was a display of what it was like in the old days so I was snapping away happily at 630am until I heard a loud cough from inside the tent .. woops …

And finally the last pic of this little motel tour , the front entrance to our digs

This was my last night in the desert before I crossed over to NSW and Victoria , spending my last night on the road in a little town called Broken Hill. It was a great trip and the dogs did a great job of not pissing me off too much .. Chaos has been all over Australia ( except Western Australia and Tasmania ) but this was little Mayhem’s first trip anywhere .. she was a natural ..

* Maisie finds her comfort zone in the car.

In between naps she would climb up behind the back seat and launch herself kamikaze style at Chaos’s head . It kept them amused …..

Until next time !!

Cheers

Kel xx

Categories: animals, Aussie pubs, Australian, bush, cars, entertainment, funny, Humor, humour, lifestyle, Photography, random, road trips, Travel, WTF | Tags: , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , | 3 Comments

I Am Not The Animal Whisperer .. Can Someone Explain This to Them ???


Ahhhh real bush living , it doesn’t get much better than this . My new house is doing me the world of good , and I don’t regret moving out here at all .. Its just some things take more getting used to than others …

I have become the female Aussie version of Dr Dolittle . Indoors or outdoors every time I turn around a little non-human face is watching me. I have a house full of geckos , a toilet full of green tree frogs – and occasionally the odd spider , a possum or two in the roof and the biggest fattest cane toads in Australia. A few days ago I was walking  Chaos and spotted my first snake out here which was a bit ironic as I was walking through the nudist camp next door – my mother of all people was the first one to turn that story into a rude joke . I go to have a shower and there is usually a tree frog hiding under the taps ( I suspect as I am starting to look like a tree frog myself he may be perving on me …)

I don’t mind him apart from the fact he moves between the toilet and the shower which makes him a bit of a weirdo but at least he isn’t a toad …

The cane toads can always be relied upon to show up when you least expect it , like when you grab your shoe off the ground and a toad the size of Dave’s hand jumps out from underneath ( at 5am in the morning this is a better wake up call than coffee).

Apart from the nudist’s , my other neighbor’s are buffalo and walking around the block has never been so intimidating. They are apparently ‘tame’ but that doesn’t make me feel any better – just last week a Territory man was gored to death by his own pet bull. And they just stare at you – they make me feel like I’m the one with horns growing out of my head !

So I did what anyone would do when they are surrounded by animals – I got another one ! Introducing Mayhem …

* Little Maisy
Now there is a method to my madness , I bought Mayhem ( Maisy) to keep Chaos company because when this little Gumnut Kid gets here he will not be getting as much attention . I thought a friend would be the perfect solution – I was wrong. For the last few days he has been treating her as if she doesn’t exist. So I have 2 dogs that want my undivided attention instead of amusing each other !!! It will get better I have been told – apparently male dogs aren’t that interested in puppies so hopefully he’ll snap out of his attitude by the time the baby arrives.

I have to finish this post now as Maisy has just regurgitated earplugs all over the floor and I need to clean it up before she walks it through the house ….

Categories: animals, bush, funny, Humor, humour, lifestyle, Only in the Territory, Photography, random | Tags: , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , | 4 Comments

Crazy Pic of The Week


 

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Dave and I went for a bush – bash in his ‘cruiser through our new property .. And came face to face with this goofy looking termite mound

Pic : Taken by us ! 🙂

 

Categories: Australian, bush, entertainment, funny, Humor, humour, Only in the Territory, Photography, random, WTF | Tags: , , , , , , | 8 Comments

A Postcard From Broome


Dear Everyone ,

I have left the Territory ! Not for good , rest easy Ill be back ( yes that’s a threat AND a promise !).

I am currently on a working holiday in Broome , Western Australia which is , according to the brochure in font of me , 2,389 km north of Perth and 1,859 km south west of Darwin NT. I am working at the Roebuck Hotel as a skimpy barmaid 4 hrs a day , 6 days a week and the rest of the time I am shopping , exploring and lying around this place ….

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I have to say the accommodation this venue gives it’s workers makes every other place I have traveled to for work look like prison camps ! We get our own hotel room which is serviced daily and one free restaurant meal a day usually valued around $40. The last time I worked away I was given a room above the pub which in order to go to the toilet I had to walk down two corridors and unlock several doors .. then there was a storm and the roof caved in above my room. The meals were whatever was left at 9pm in the bain maree of the pub next door – usually something nice and cold ;). So needless to say this time round I am in heaven !!

I never did explain to everyone exactly what my blog title is about – well the skimpy style part anyway .. Now seems an appropriate time to do this. I fly to mining towns around Australia and work for two weeks behind the bar of the local pub , usually dressed something like this …

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In some places , every hour a girl will walk around the bar with a jug and collect money then all the skimpys will change into a bikini or lingerie for half an hour while working. I made $5000 in one week doing this ! This particular hotel does not make you do jugs ( pun intended hahaha ) which I like because I hate doing them although the extra money would of been handy. Even without the extra tips I still stand to make $2000 in 2 weeks working bugger all hours so gotta be happy with that !

This Sunday we are being taken on a tour by the locals we have met so I will have more to report on Broome after the weekend. Ill leave you with a few more happy snaps and another apology for being so sporadic with my posts , I am literally all over the place at the moment !!

Cheers ! Kel Xx

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Sun Pictures – An old out door cinema and where I will be tonight after work 😀

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A shady picture of me with a statue of an old school Pearl Diver …

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My co Skimpy and biggest Munroe fan ever the lovely Ruby 🙂

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Checking out some real photography !!

Categories: Aussie pubs, entertainment, fashion, funny, Humor, Photography, Travel | Tags: , , , , , , , , , , , | 5 Comments

I Have Been MIA – Sorry Guys , Here is My Excuse Note !!


Hello my long-lost fellow blogger’s ! 🙂 I have been a very slack girl in the blogging world lately and feel I owe it to you all (again!) to explain why .

First of all my two mates from WA arrived a week ago and I have been playing tour guide again. We have been to all the hotspots such as Litchfeild National Park and a few pubs on Mitchell street ( can’t remember which ones , the girls were feeding me double vodka’s … ). After a great recommendation by my mate Phil O’brian  Monday and Tuesday saw us soaking up the awesome landscape and serenity on this really cool houseboat

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We floated along the Mary River for 2 days on this bad boy and I know you all wont believe me but I have NEVER seen so many crocodiles IN MY LIFE !! No shit there was one every 20 meters along the bank. The girls made a Kels Gone Bush video for my You tube and blog so I wont go into more detail lets just say you’ll find it quite amusing .. I did kind of take the piss out of the show Swamp People .. and made my first bush tucker recipe for you all to enjoy woo hoo !

As well as all this excitement I have just started my new company and website http://www.instyleeventsandpromotions.com for anyone who wants a gander ….. This has been taking up most of my spare time and if you do check out the site you will see I still have stacks of work to do .. but I’m getting there !

So I hope you will all excuse me for my absence – Dave and the girls fly out Sunday so I will be back in fine form next week to block out the pangs of loneliness I will no doubt experience come Sunday night ! At least I still have my blogging fam to catch up on 😉 I cant wait to sit down and read all of my favorite blogs for 4 hrs solid !!

Before I go I would just like to ask am I the only one that has a thousand awesome ideas a day but absolutely no time to ever pull them off ??? Maybe I should sell them 😉

I’ll be back sooooooon !

Categories: Arnhem Land, Aussie pubs, Australian, boat, bush, crocs, Darwin, entertainment, fishing, funny, Humor, lifestyle, Only in the Territory, Photography, random, road trips, Travel, video | Tags: , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , | 7 Comments

A Gold Star is A Gold Star , No Matter How Old You Are


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Hello People !!! Today was absolutely fantabulous !! I got up after an awesome sleep , drove my new (old) Suzuki swift 93 edition ( named Princess ) that my fantabulous boyfriend purchased for me on Friday ( he is now in charge of all motor vehicle purchases ever since the disaster we call the Honda civic that I bought last year and drove for 3 weeks before it broke…not my fault by the way – more about that in the future …)

So anyway I’m driving to work in my new race car and made it there 10 min early due to driving a car that actually does the bloody speed limit ( the Troopy took 5 mins to get to 100kms an hour ! ). I packed all the free shit into Black Betty and went to do my radio cross as usual. Now for the best part : I drive back to the station to drop the van off and pick up the Princess. Before I left I stopped in to see the brekky presenters Tom and Sarah when shit went down ..:

Me : Hey guys all went well , I guess Ill catch ya tomorrow

Sarah: Actually we wanted to tell you something

Me: (thinking fuck here it goes again , I’m fired ): Oh right sweet whats up?

Sarah: We were just talking about how you’re getting really good at this ..

Tom : Yeah your flow is heaps better and its sounds more natural ..

Me : *aw shucks guys * grinning like the Cheshire cat !

I practice every script 5 times before I say it but lately I have it memorized so well  I have started to ad lib etc and obviously its paying off. When I first begun I didn’t think I would last due to my excessive swearing in real life ( I tone it down a bit for my blog ‘cos hey I want people to read it ! ) I really wanted this job so I practiced hard and look ! Practice is starting to make (nearly) perfect !

Categories: Australian, cars, entertainment, radio, random | Tags: , , , , , | 4 Comments

Snake on a plane … the real life version


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A couple of days ago a Territory pilot flying over Darwin made a mayday call to the Darwin airport to report he had a snake chasing a tree frog around the cockpit of his tiny aircraft . He was forced to make an emergency landing with this snake crawling around his feet and popping in and out of various plane equipment – I tell ya this guy deserves a medal !

Anyway he managed to land safely at the Darwin Airport where he was met by airport security , firefighters (just in case the snake was also an arsonist ) and the Australian Federal Police , who were obviously there to charge the snake with boarding without a ticket .. I mean come on WTF ?? Its a snake people , not the Hells Angels !

After all the dramas they still have not managed to find either the snake or the tree frog despite extensive searching over the last few days – unfortunately for the airline the plane will remain on the ground until they do …

Categories: cops, Darwin, entertainment, humour, WTF | Tags: , , , , , , | 3 Comments

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